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“Exactly mid-way through the frigid month of February

A day is celebrated by the dumb and ordinary.

And all around me, notes are passed by idiots and stupids—

Packed tight with sugar-mottoed hearts and naked pudgy cupids.

This ritual, conducted under heart-shaped, crimson flag,

Does absolutely nothing for me, but to make me gag!”

This tongue-in-cheek, rhymed story is a hilarious gift. Features UnValentine cards in the back of the book!